Finding the New You
By Jerry Grimes
Congratulations—you’re retired! Now what?
After taking a break to sleep in or catch up on books or TV, most retired people begin to wonder how to rebuild their social lives. And therein lies a real challenge. Study after study shows that newly retired folks often feel cut off from work friends they once saw every day. Many others battle loneliness after losing a partner or becoming isolated while caring for someone with a long-term illness. According to a Harvard study, about 40 percent of people over 60 feel isolated and struggle with loneliness. The question is, how do you overcome it?
Getting out there—making new friends and finding ways to stay connected—is the answer. And while retirement brings more free time, staying active and engaged in the community doesn’t just happen. It takes intention and focus. That’s where many of us stall, broken down on the road of good intentions. To help, we’ve compiled this guide to “Getting Out There.”
While finding community may feel intimidating, it’s far from impossible. Our survey of people and programs across the Midlands suggests that encouragement and curiosity go a long way. “The way of isolation is the road to dying,” says Mary Katherine Bagnel, retired owner of Senior Matters, a local business serving seniors and their families. “What I suggest—and what I think I am an example of—is that you have to initiate a new life.”
After retiring, Bagnel went from sixty-hour workweeks to almost no schedule at all. She joined a local gym, began exercising to meet new people, participated in a Bible study, and took up weaving, a childhood interest. She didn’t stop there, enrolling in a variety of classes, including blacksmithing. Through it all, she learned that the first step is often the hardest—and the most important. “Sometimes I even go with people to get them going,” she says. “This is new to them, so why not take an hour with your parents, friends, or whomever you’re trying to help? You end up doing it together.”
There is no shortage of inspiring examples—people who are staying active as they age. Linda Peterson, 78, a Forest Acres native, has always believed in movement and connection. A self-described tomboy growing up, she played sports early on and later stayed active through tennis, softball, and volleyball. In recent years, she’s added pickleball and bridge to the mix. When her husband died ten years ago, the friendships she’d built through recreation became a lifeline. Despite multiple back surgeries and lingering neuropathy, she continues to push herself. “I push myself because I enjoyed those things—and by golly, I got out there and did,” Peterson says. “Getting out and going and doing things gets your mind in a different direction, and when you’re tired, you sleep better.”
Columbia resident, Nancy L., is in her 80s and swears by daily movement and strong relationships. A longtime tennis player, she helped organize senior teams and later encouraged her friends to try pickleball when indoor options became available. She also plays bridge, which she sees as mental exercise. “While pickleball exercises the body, bridge exercises the mind,” she says. “And the icing on the cake is you’re always doing it with friends.” Beyond sports and cards, she stays deeply involved in church life—singing in the choir, participating in senior groups, and organizing theater outings for friends.
For many people, churches become natural gathering places later in life. In and around Forest Acres, faith communities offer connection, routine, and belonging. Some host structured senior programs that combine learning, movement, shared meals, and fellowship, while others foster connection through classes, retreats, outings, and social events rooted in worship and community life. In or close to Forest Acres, churches like Eastminster Presbyterian, Shandon Baptist, Forest Lake Presbyterian, First Baptist downtown and Forest Lake Presbyterian offer a rich menu of activities open to members and non-members alike.
Local clubs and civic organizations provide additional paths to connection. Masonic lodges offer membership and fellowship for men and women, with many activities open to the public. Organizations such as the VFW and American Legion—while primarily serving veterans—often host public social events like billiards, dancing, and karaoke nights.
Public recreational and educational opportunities also play an important role. Local governments and nonprofit organizations offer programs through parks, libraries, community centers, and wellness facilities designed to combat isolation, promote healthy living, and encourage lifelong learning. These opportunities help older adults stay physically active, mentally engaged, and socially connected.
For others, purpose becomes the bridge to connection. Part-time work and volunteering provide meaningful ways to stay engaged while giving back. Retailers, service organizations, hospitals, airports, churches, and animal shelters all rely on mature adults to fill roles that involve social interaction and service—from greeting visitors to caring for pets or supporting events behind the scenes.
Making new connections can feel overwhelming at first, but the rewards of stepping outside your comfort zone are worth it. Ask others about their interests. Look for opportunities at coffee shops, libraries, art galleries, the golf course and online community boards. Whether you join a group, attend a class, or simply strike up a conversation, you may soon find yourself surrounded by people who enrich your life.
So why wait? Pick up the phone, send the email, or show up to that first gathering. New friends and experiences are waiting—often just around the corner.
RESOURCES:
Local Masonic Lodges, multiple locations throughout the Midlands; inquire locally or online for meeting times and public events
Veterans of Foreign Wars (VFW) and American Legion Posts, multiple Columbia-area locations; many host public social events
Columbia Parks and Recreation Department, 1111 Recreation Drive, Columbia, SC 29201, (803) 545-3100, parksandrec.columbiasc.gov
Senior Resources, Inc., 2817 Millwood Avenue, Columbia, SC 29205, (803) 2527734, seniorresourcesinc.org
Richland County Recreation Commission, 7473 Parklane Road, Columbia, SC 29223, (803) 741-7272, richlandcountyrecreation.com
Shepherd’s Center of Columbia, 2100 Bull Street, Columbia, SC 29201, (803) 771-9981, shepherdscentercolumbia.org
Prisma Health SeniorCare PACE – Shandon, 2400 Harden Street, Columbia, SC 29204, (803) 296-4357, prismahealth.org/pace
